Time is our teacher *9 months down*

When Brian got orders to South Korea for a year it hit me like a ton of bricks. It seemed like such a long time to be away and we knew we would be facing many hurtles along the way.  I was 18 weeks pregnant when he left and decided the best place for me at the time was to live with my parents in Florida. (Great decision!) I wanted so badly for time to hurry up so we could be together again and hold our baby girl! Everything went so perfect and I felt so lucky he got to come home for Makenzie's birth but knew in the back of my head he would be leaving again to go back. He left and I have to say I didn't know what to think. I felt fine. I felt sad. I felt scared. I felt angry! That time with our new baby girl was supposed to be shared with my husband and I together as a family. And that wasn't going to happen. One of the greater disappointments for me to deal with during this tour was the over all sense of the loss of time. Think of all the things that happen in a year plus of time, you know? You can't get time back, not even by grieving its loss. Poof! Every second that passes is just gone. It broke my heart knowing all of the great things he would be missing out on in Makenzie's first 11 months of life. For a while there I was really down in the dumps thinking about "how it should have been", and I would get so angry! I realized though that thinking in such a way was not fair to Kenzie, Brian, or myself and I am a stronger person because of them. I keep reminding myself when things get to be too much that I AM STRONG! I HAVE TO STAY STONG! We can do this! We are 9 months in and I find myself feeling "ok". Of coarse I have my moments of pitty but only let myself go there for a split second. Its just not worth it. We have our routines down and talk on a regular basis. Kenzie is our main focus of topic and it's so cool to see her starting to react to things Brian does over FaceTime. Time is passing by! I think once January hits we will see the light at then end of the tunnel. I calculated and figured out that if he comes home mid May then he will have been gone a total of 473ish days! Wow! We ONLY have 170ish days to go! That sounds terrible but what do you do. Found this quote  and liked it...

"Time is the cruelest teacher; first she gives the test, then she teaches the lesson"- Unknown